Limericks

I need to take my bike out for a ride
But the hard saddle I just can`t abide
A soft sprung one is much better
To stop you being a fretter


It`s the London Marathon this Sunday
But some won`t finish `til Monday
A few may even give up
And stop for a cup

They say, to keep fit,you should walk
But I know them, they`re all ruddy talk

They`ll raise lots of money for charity
I watched it in 3D, such clarity

They say, to keep fit,you should walk
But I know them, they`re all ruddy talk
They buy a good bike and it sits in the garage

They`ll raise lots of money for charity
I watched it in 3D, such clarity
But one poor chap died

They say, to keep fit, you should walk
But I know them, they`re all ruddy talk
They buy a good bike and it sits in the garage
While they take a ride in a fancy carriage


They`ll raise lots of money for charity
I watched it in 3D, such clarity
But one poor chap died
So hard he had tried

________________________

They say, to keep fit, you should walk
But I know them, they`re all ruddy talk
They buy a good bike and it sits in the garage
While they take a ride in a fancy carriage
Then at walking they all tend to balk

Watched the Giro d`Italia today



They`ll raise lots of money for charity
I watched it in 3D, such clarity
But one poor chap died
So hard had he tried
It`s certainly no cause for jocularity

Friends are in Stoupa this week

Watched the Giro d`Italia today
A good place to be in chilly mid May


Friends are in Stoupa this week
Sun and warmth is what they seek

Watched the Giro d`Italia today
A good place to be in chilly mid May
They`re sure to keep warm
By riding a storm


Friends are in Stoupa this week
Sun and warmth is what they seek
It`s a good time of year
Much better than here

Watched the Giro d`Italia today
A good place to be in chilly mid May
They`re sure to keep warm
By riding a storm
And keeping their rivals at bay

Suddenly everything's turned green


Friends are in Stoupa this week
Sun and warmth is what they seek
It`s a good time of year
Much better than here
We could look at the webcam and peek!

The skies are full of stars so bright

Suddenly everything`s turned green
I`d go to the doctors then ( if you know what I mean )

The skies are full of stars so bright
But they`re better if you only look at night

Suddenly everything`s turned green
I`d go to the doctors then ( if you know what I mean )
Is it something you ate?
No silly the trees are my fate

The skies are full of stars so bright
But they`re better if you only look at night
When the clouds clear away
And it is no longer day

Watching nature is just the best cure
Although sometimes it`s hard to endure

The best thing`s a field full of Fireflies
Either that or a bag of salted French fries

Watching nature is just the best cure
Although sometimes it`s hard to endure
In the cold and the wet
And nowhere a vet



The best thing`s a field full of Fireflies
Either that or a bag of salted French fries
Oh, have you no soul?
Or even the gall

Watching nature is just the best cure
Although sometimes it`s hard to endure
In the cold and the wet
And nowhere a vet
To do something about all that manure

So, Jose Mourinho is back



The best thing`s a field full of Fireflies
Either that or a bag of salted French fries
Oh, have you no soul?
Or even the gall
You`re right.... I forget the meat pies

The Referendum vote`s drawing near

So,Jose Mourinho is back
Now t`other one`s got the sack
I`ll watch with some interest

The Referendum vote`s drawing near
But which way are you voting my dear ?
That would be telling

So, Jose Mourinho is back
Now t`other ones`s got the sack
I`ll watch with some interest
If he passes the big test
And see if Guardiola his comments can hack

Bomb scare during exams yesterday


The Referendum vote`s drawing near
But which way are you voting my dear ?
That would be telling
Which means you`re rebelling ??
Not saying. But if we leave I won`t shed a tear

Got fox cubs at the bottom of the garden

Bomb scare during exams today
A hoax,or some sort of foul play
The kids were delighted

Got fox cubs at the bottom of the garden
If they eat your veg will you grant pardon
I feed them with mints

Bomb scare during exams today
A hoax,or some sort of foul play
The kids were delighted
And not at all 'frighted'


Got fox cubs at the bottom of the garden
If they eat your veg will you grant pardon
I feed them with mints
To give them big hints